Command Decision
by GrandEclectus
Summary: For every decision, there are consequences. JC
1. Chapter 1

Sorry for not posting this sooner; I was having difficulty with the site...

Title: Command Decision

Fandom: Star Trek: Voyager

Rating/Genre: T+, J/C , Adult themes. Sorry, nothing torrid. Another exploration into the frustrating J/C relationship—the greatest non-romance in sci-fi history!

Complete: April 2007

Disclaimers: Voyager and its characters belong to Paramount

Archive: Yes, but please let me know so you can get the latest version.

**Command Decision**

The Doctor waved his tricorder over Janeway and "uh-huh'ed" with irksome regularity. She rolled her eyes with irritation and pursed her lips with his every syllable.

"Doctor, please! Spare me!" she waved him off. "If you have something to tell me, then tell me."

"All right, then Captain, please lie back," he instructed in his chirpy manner as he ignored her request. He put a hand on her shoulder and pushed her gently onto his bio-bed.

"Ah-hhah" he said, as he observed his readings.

"Hummm," he harrumphed with each bit of information.

"Yes, that's fine," he said finally.

"Doctor!" she spurted as he walked off to his office.

"Oh, you can get up now," he gave permission as an afterthought. "We're finished."

She gave him a searing look as he entered information onto a PADD. She righted herself from her prone position on the bed and approached the doctor who behaved as if she just walked into sickbay.

"Ah, Captain, you'll be happy to know you are 100 healthy for a woman of your age. Your biological functions are proceeding naturally. Of course, some women approach this time of their life in different…"

"Doctor, are you saying what I think you're saying?" she shook her head.

"Captain?"

"Universal translator version, Doctor," she insisted.

"Oh, why, ah…You've entered perimenopause, of course."

Janeway felt as if she had just been slapped as realization flooded over her. The inevitable natural process had begun.

"Now, you are aware that no two women are exactly alike," he went on, "but we have many treatments and therapies for hot flashes and other bothersome symptoms if they occur. Have you been experiencing any problems that you haven't told me about?"

Janeway stared at the deck in a daze. The EMH was caught off guard by her reaction.

"Captain, I assure you, you are perfectly healthy and normal," he informed her, thinking that perhaps she was worried about a physical condition.

"Thank you, Doctor," she intoned as she gathered herself and left sickbay.

That evening she stood in her room looking at the stars without seeing them. She had made her choices in life, she told herself. She believed that all along she was aware of the consequences, but the sudden realization that she may be out of choices left her feeling cold. She was not prone to crying but she felt she was on the verge of tearful emotion. She had dealt with Borg and all the hazards of the Delta Quadrant, but this was different.

Her doorbell chimed once and then again. From somewhere in outer space, she finally heard it.

"Come," she said, her voice more feeble than she wanted it to be.

Chakotay entered her quarters. She had forgotten their working dinner.

"Captain?" he questioned. "I can come back if you're not ready."

"No. I'm sorry." She said from far away. "It slipped my mind."

"That's not like you," he said, furrowing his brow.

He knew her every mood too well and his friendship at that moment only added to her discomfort.

"You had a check up today," he observed. "Is everything alright?"

She smiled wryly. Chakotay was aware of her every move. Maybe that was the sign of a good First Officer. Maybe it was something else.

"The Doctor says I'm in 100 percent health."

"Well, that's good," he smiled, relieved. "But, there is something on your mind. Would you like to talk about it?"

"Let's get on those reports." was her answer. "Sorry about dinner. I don't have much of an appetite."

"I can still operate a mean replicator," he told her with a dimpled grin. "Would you like some coffee? Somehow it doesn't look like you without a cup in your hand."

Did he have to notice every detail?

"No. I'm fine."

She managed to put her feelings aside, as she always did. The pair plowed through a pile of work in a short time. Chakotay was on top of every specific of running the ship, as always. It was a relief.

Janeway would not allow her mind to drift. She retained her focus on the job at hand. The way she always did. The way she always would.

When they finished, Chakotay looked at her and regarded her with his usual discernment.

"Thank you, Chakotay," she tried when they had finished. "I'll see you in the morning."

He smiled knowingly. He rose from the table and began to leave, but he could not just leave her like this.

"I'm not going ask you what's wrong," he began. "I know you won't tell me. But, you should know, I'm here for you."

Damn him! She choked up and closed her eyes, but she did not need open eyes to realize the mistake she had made on New Earth. Her mind's eye could still picture this beautiful man who continued to love her, who would…no, _gave_ his life for her every day. If she had simply let him love her in the way he wanted, the way he still wanted to…

"Good night, Chakotay" she managed to say as levelly as she could.

And he left.


	2. Chapter 2

Command Decision, Part 2

_For every fork in the road what if, there was another reality?_

- - - - -- - - -- - - - - - - - - -

Janeway tolerated the EMH's "uhs" and "hummms" and occasional outbursts of a few bars of an aria.

"Ah," he said. "Oooh" he spurted with gushed with satisfaction.

"Doctor, remind me to have B'Elanna look over your program. You may have a few bugs in your bedside manner subroutines."

"Now now. No need for that," he scolded. "You know there is nothing wrong with any of my subroutines;" he chirped as he walked back to his office, "however you appear to have a couple new subroutines of your own developing."

It took her a split second to fathom his odd remark. Her face lit up with a bright smile.

"Doctor?" she asked tentatively, "Are you saying…"

"Congratulations, Captain! You are in 100 percent perfect health. Oh, and you are expecting your third and forth children."

She smiled in disbelief. Twins! Was this real?

The Doctor went back to his office. As an afterthought he asked "Should I inform Commander Chakotay, or…"

She broke from her reverie to command, "Don't you dare! If you do that, I'll have B'Elanna do more than fix a few bugs!"

"Very well. I was just trying to be helpful." And then he added, "Mmm. Mood swings. I can see that everything is proceeding naturally.

"Captain, we have treatments for mood disorders, so…" He could tell she was not listening to him as she left sickbay.

"Twins," she said as she floated out of sickbay.

Later that evening Janeway stood in their quarters, barely able to contain her joy. It took every ounce of her determination to keep the news from her husband through their entire shift. He knew her well, too well, and several times, he quietly asked her what was going on.

"Nothing, Commander." She would say each time and then change the subject to status reports, maintenance schedules, EPS conduits, or other routine starship occurrences.

Chakotay entered their quarters with a couple of PADDS in hand.

"What's this?" he asked when he saw their dinner table meticulously laid out with a feast and elegant table settings. A pair of candles flicked lightly casting a romantic tone to the room.

"I had Neelix whip us up a special dinner and B'Elanna and Tom are looking after the kids."

"I think I'm trouble!" he smiled. He put the PADD to the side and held her in his arms.

"What do you mean, Commander?" she said feigning ignorance.

"If you've taken this much time to have dinner for us," he said warily, "then you've been waiting to ambush me! Are you planning to add another member to our family 'crew'?" he said as he pulled her closer and kissing her cheek.

"The Captain is not obligated to inform her First Officer of her every move," she said virtually bubbling with the news inside her.

"Go ahead. Pull rank!" he said playfully. "Quote regulations if you like! You know I love it when you talk Starfleet," he nuzzled her neck.

She allowed herself to enjoy his arms. For a moment, she imagined what her life would have been like had she obeyed strict protocol on New Earth. Every day, she thanked the stars for Chakotay. He stood by her side when she had been full with their first two children. He could have insisted that she step down command when she was pregnant but he had unflinching faith in her abilities.

Janeway and Chakotay felt they needed to be discreet during their romance. Despite their caution, it was common knowledge throughout the ship. It might as well have been broadcast on all frequencies. Subspace chatter aside, the crew never so much as raised an eyebrow when the pair had announced their plans to marry. In fact, there was unanimous support, cheers and celebration. Some things simply trumped protocol and the love they shared for each other was one of those things.

"I can still see you on the bridge, as big as a house, shouting commands when we had that Borg attack," he reminisced.

"I was not big as a house!" she pretended to be insulted.

"You were!"

"Was not."

"And you handled yourself and the ship like, well, like I knew you would."

"We sent the Borg packing and…

"Delivered our first daughter that evening."

He held her and kissed her sweetly.

"You know," she began, "giving in to you on New Earth was probably the best decision of my career."

He chuckled. "I thought it was more like me giving in to you."

"Well, we can debate that forever, Commander," she said. "In the mean time," she raised her eyebrows, "I have some news for you."

When she revealed her secret, Chakotay felt her joy in his own heart.

"Here's to good decisions," he smiled, raising a glass.

"Indeed!" she agreed.

_fin_


End file.
